Not Falling Behind by Pat Conrad MD

bionic

There is just no way this is not funny: the Imperial College (of) London has developed a $13,300 prototype robotic rectum to help train medical students in doing proper rectal exams. “The prosthetic turns out to be much more than the sum of its parts. As a finger probes, robotic arms push back to recreate the, ahem, behavior of an actual rectum, and the bot tracks the finger’s position as well as force to provides constant feedback.”

Have performance anxiety? Too bad: “The whole thing is viewable via a 3D display so student and teacher can appreciate the ins and outs of the procedure together in a way that wasn’t possible before.”

Don’t tell me there aren’t other, equally relevant uses in today’s exciting new medicine. Won’t the hospital administrator want one for the office, to practice the best technique on the next doc he/she is gonna nail? Will the latest urology surgical reps start giving these to offices, with their corporate logo embossed on one cheek? Will insurance companies start trying to withhold payment for prostate ultrasounds if the examiner can’t prove he had stayed digitally current? Will the robot include realistic fluid responses? Could they invent one for the spouse to chew on in lieu of the doc working late, missing another dinner party? I know there are other uses I’m missing…help me out.

87510cookie-checkNot Falling Behind by Pat Conrad MD