Top 15 Ways to Cheaply Boost Staff Morale

  1. Have all providers go bottomless for the day.
  2. Dress as your favorite patient; extra points for mimicking the correct smell.
  3. Pretend you are an administrator for the day and do no work.
  4. Hide your favorite demented patient and play hide and go seek.
  5. Go on an outing to your favorite cemetery and see who can locate the most patients….er, ex-patients.
  6. Play the insulin game.  Each staff member takes 30 u of regular insulin and see who passes out first.   Have plenty of candy or glucagon around.
  7. Grease the hallway with Vaseline and see who can slide the farthest.  This can also be left on the floor for the rest of the day to see how many patients fall (a cruel but hysterical game).
  8. Play Russian roulette with urine containers.  Save enough samples of urine and place some apple juice in other ones.  See who makes the most mistakes with a taste-testing contest.
  9. Have a creative cookie swap with treats that look like different stool samples you have collected over the years.
  10. Decorate the office like a morgue and see how many patients it creeps out.
  11. Have a Cinco de Pendo Day and have everyone wear adult diapers for the day.  Then lock the bathroom door and see who uses them.
  12. Give each staff member a list of five annoying patients and have them call their place of work with meaningless questions or angry demands.
  13. Have your staff bring their children to work for a day and then set up a fake code to scare them (into never going into the medical field).
  14. Invite the hottest drug reps to come in at the same time to compete for your business.  This does nothing for your staff but you will love it and your staff can be happy vicariously through you.
  15. Hold a monthly potluck day where one member brings in a homemade dish that contains medical marijuana.

  2 comments for “Top 15 Ways to Cheaply Boost Staff Morale

  1. Richard W. Mondak
    December 7, 2011 at 2:04 pm

    I actually did this one:

    Have a high ranking police official come to the office with an ‘official-looking’ warrant and two dozen donuts.

    He presented the donuts to the Nurse, cuffed the provider (me) and we walked out of the back door with a nearly full waiting room…. (my very good friend since Junior High School is Chief of Police in a town where we had a weekly clinic, but the Staff did know know that).

    He was afraid that the Nurses would not take it well and would be upset with both of us. After the shocked silence, they talked about it jokingly for weeks.

  2. Burton Mendel
    November 30, 2011 at 2:23 pm

    Here’s another:
    Dress an undercover police-person as your receptionist then post a “Free Narcotic Scripts Today” sign in your window.

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